Spinning down that highway of life

I'd like to take a moment to write down some thoughts I've had the past couple of days. Our family was involved in an accident Friday night while heading down the freeway in the rain. It was one of those experiences that cause you to evaluate your life and the path you are on.

We had left a nice dinner at my cousin Stephanie's house on Friday night and it was starting to rain pretty hard. We were headed to Deep Creek to spend a nice weekend up at our parents vacation home before fall settled in. It was around 9:30 when we left and the rain was coming down hard. Christy and I turned on the Mckain Obama debate and listened to it while we drove. We had a long drive ahead of us and I wanted to make it as quick as possible before I got too sleepy. I know how dangerous sleep and driving are and that you can't do both of them together very well.

Christy had a car accident in the rain when she was in high school, lost control of the car, jumped the median, and nearly hit a metro bus coming from the opposite direction, before crashing into a tree on the other side of the street. I've been a little more cautious since moving out East when I felt my altima skid around a corner or two that I would normally have taken fine while in Idaho or Utah. I quickly learned that the roads were a bit more slick out here when it rained, I figured it had something to do with the humidity.

So I was driving, fast at first, passing many cars that were driving too cautiously for others good in my opinion. I was going about 70 most of the way. After the debate Christy laid the seat back to try to sleep. Bryce had fallen asleep in his seat, and Carter was actually already at the lake house with his grandparents, he had gone the day before. About two hours after leaving, with the rain coming off and on, the road was definitely wet the whole way. We came around a slight turn in the freeway and the unexpected happened. Traveling at about 70, the rear of the car started to come around from the right and the car started steering to the left. I was in shock.

This can't be happening. Try to steer into the skid. Let off the gas. Don't brake or else that will make this worse. CRAP this isn't working. (The car continued to turn until it was completely sideways to the freeway) Oh my gosh I can't believe this!!! We are going to flip this going 70!!! Get ready to flip. Will we survive this if we flip at this speed?! We are going to die!!! I can't believe I am going to kill my family! This is how it's going to end?! (The car continues to spin and we are backwards then sideways again and forward briefly, then sideways...at this point I don't know if the car did two full spins or just the one...It happened so quick and my mind was in dis-belief) I'm not ready to die! I start saying "Oh my gosh!" "Oh my gosh!" over and over out loud. (then we start heading for the guardrail in the median that separates the two freeways, I believe at this point I had the brake pressed down all the way hard. I figured that if I didn't have control anyway, I didn't want to be going fast without control, and I just didn't know what else to do. We headed for the guardrail and we were still going pretty fast. I braced myself for the shock.) I need to be unhurt through this so I can help Christy and Bryce. Why doesn't the car seem to be slowing, I've been pushing on the brake for like 3 seconds now!!!! (We smash into the guardrail and that bounces us off of it and slows us down a bit, but we keep spinning in the grass and end up facing mostly forward just touching the road again.) I keep saying "Oh my gosh!" and have a death grip on the steering wheel. Christy is saying "It's okay" "It's okay", which was actually very re-assuring. I am shaking uncontrollably at this point and we are in shock at what just happened. A semi or a truck passes right by us on the freeway and doesn't slow. They have no idea what just happened!

Christy looks in the back and says, "Oh no Bryce!" or something to that effect. He was in his car seat but had tipped over and was in the middle of the seat sideways, still sleeping! The car seat wasn't buckled in place! I quickly back the car into the median to get us off the freeway. We calm down a bit, and I get out of the car to assess the damage. The front half of our bumper is missing, we see it sticking out of the guardrail about 60 feet back. It is starting to rain pretty hard again. I then dropped to my knee to offer a quick prayer of thanks to Heavenly Father. After about 20 or more minutes getting calmed down we head off again.

We don't know when this life will end for us. While driving afterward I kept thinking of the scripture that this life is the time to prepare to meet God. I would still be the same spirit person I am now, I would have the same desires I do now, the same thoughts I do now. I know those aren't always very Godly, are they mostly Godly, 50% Godly, less?! I know I have work to do. I don't want death to take me unprepared, yet how was I to know that I would have a close call that night? Life is definitely short and precious. We sang the hymn today in church "More holiness give me" and the verse "more sorrow for sin" stayed with me. Am I so calloused with the way I am living that I don't even think of some of the things I do as "sin?" And furthermore, now that I've had such an experience, will I do anything about it or brush it off as over and keep living my life the same way, saying that we are well, we got "lucky". Or will I give God the credit due and make a change?